2016: {Breathe}

I have a love-hate relationship.
With myself.
(Don't we all.) 
I know that I have God-given talents and gifts.
I know that I am loved and occasionally appreciated.
I know that I have purpose and mission.
But sometimes, I really hate how I am....

I am driven and motivated.
I am goal-oriented and organized.
I am determined, fully committed, focused, and intense.
But because of all those very qualities I am also very anxious and tightly wound.
I freak out over little things, I stress, I snap and explode.
I frequently over-react, because to me everything is extremely important, even when it's not.
And it unfortunately affects everyone around me.

I have a very difficult time just letting loose and enjoying a moment, and not being critical or gripped by fear.

It hit me when our family went sledding this past weekend. Sledding is an activity that can end badly in a flash and I was overwhelmed by fear....
Of someone sliding down at a diagonal and crashing into the brick bathroom building at the bottom of the hill.
Or wiping out and then getting slammed by the next sledder.
Or flying off a sled and busting your head or face in a tumble.
To me they were valid fears because I stood at the bottom of the snow hill watching many of these events happen repeatedly.  My chest was in knots, as I continually shouted for the kids to Be careful, Watch out, Wait.
When all I really wanted was to laugh and enjoy making memories sledding together as a family.

Oh how I want this.

SO, I want to spend some time this 2016 to learn some strategies for overcoming anxious situations, to trust in God's provision, and to {BREATHE} before reacting. I want to feel a constant stream of renewing and peace, to let a wave of calmness wash over me instead of exploding on my precious loves. Slowly, continuously, BREATHE.... ...... .....