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Thursday, March 14, 2013

Thankful Thursday

It's been a really long time since I've participated in this.  But I need to.  Guys, I am really struggling.  With some things I can't go into here publicly.  And I'm struggling with winter blues.  Looking at my history of posts, I think this was an incredibly hard time of year last year as well.  Just feeling really down about myself, frustrated with the lack of progress in my life, unmotivated, tired, irritable with the kids and then feeling like I'm ruining them by the minute because they just copy your behaviors.  There's little room for error when you're a mom.  Sure, it's a good time to model sorry's and forgiveness, but you can only do that so much.  You HAVE to work toward changing what you're modeling, so it's behaviors you want THEM to do.  There's so much pressure, followed by feelings of failure. Yet you can't instantly change how you feel, how you react. You just can't.  It's some process that I just can't quite figure out.  So anyway, yeah, struggling.  And trying, trying to continue to look for the positives, even when it's hard.  So here I am with Thankful Thursday...

"Why, my soul, are you downcast? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God." Ps. 42:11

1.  Kevin has been working hard all week and is making amazing progress in our attic renovations. Drywall is half complete and with all the angled ceilings up there, that is by far the hardest part of the project.

2. MOPS group. It's a ton a ton of work that goes into every single meeting but our group is still continuing to grow. Even with just 2 meetings left for the year, we are getting new attendees. Knowing we are reaching more and more moms makes it all seem worth it.

3. Play dates this week.  This winter has been a whole lot of nothingness. Just nothing on the calendar at all. So several playdates this week is good.

4. Morning Bible time. There are some days where I feel like I'm just staring at words on a page. But overall it's been good to start each morning with quiet as I seek hope and truths in the Scripture. And the last 2 weeks I've actually gotten some verses fully memorized.

5. Friends. I have so many friends who really truly care. Who take the time to ask how you are really doing, and then listen. It takes a special person to do that.

6. Projects. My friend Nikki and I were getting some of her curtains sewed during preschool time yesterday. And I'm so excited that I taught her how to sew! I pinned and she sewed, and it was awesome teamwork and we got it done!

7. Weather.  We are supposed to be getting 60's temps today and tomorrow and I am thrilled for that time outside. It's so refreshing! I love and adore my kids and enjoy being with them, but having some breathing room from them is so needed sometimes.

8. Family time. It's been a busy week and I still haven't made it to the grocery store. Carter fell asleep in the car before we made it there yesterday so we ended up getting dinner in town before AWANA. We finished early and took a short walk and ended up at the skate park. We'd never been there before and had a blast climbing and running up the ramps and then sliding back down. Probably one of my favorite memories yet this year.  =)

"Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful." Col. 3:15


Kathy said...

I totally get it about being frustrated and feeling like you fail. Parenting is HARD. Super HARD. I think being thankful really helps keep things in perspective. Thanks for inspiring me to be thankful today. And hang in there! =)

The Fischer Family said...

I'm sorry you are struggling so much! Hopefully the spring can lift your spirits back up! Prayers for you!!