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Thursday, October 15, 2009

Thankful Thursday

It's been a crummy day and I've been in a lousy mood. There was a lot of anger, frustration, tears, and just plain feeling tired and weary. I am so beyond tired of Kevin's work schedule right now and there are still several weeks to go. It's nearly impossible to get anything done (like arrange to get new windows on the house before winter!) when he's absolutely not home! The sink needs fixed, the basement needs cleaned up, recyclables are taking over our house, and the yard needs work. I'm tired of the kids crying every minute, fetching them something to drink, having to wipe their butts, and breaking up fights. And it's so hard to do housework while Kevin is upstairs sleeping. Laundry piles high, clothes get strewn about, and the floors remain unvacuumed. It's so demanding, so constant, and so exhausting. Yet...this is just how I feel right now... I must continue to worship the ground my husband walks on while no one gives a care to Cinderelly slaving away at home. Ugh, my own attitude disgusts me, but I don't know how to get it out of me, how to get my head to think clearly again, how to feel peace....

I know this is so sinful, and I'm just really struggling.

Late this afternoon before heading to church for a ladies fellowship (with kids in tow!) I remembered that it's Thankful Thursday. And I knew that before this day was over I wanted to STOP and really think about what I could be thankful for. And whatdoyaknow, tonight's devotion at church was exactly about that! I need to refocus back on God and choose thankfulness, choose an "attitude of gratitude". So that's what I'm going to try to do.

Lamentations 3:22-25 "Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. I say to myself, 'The Lord is my portion; therefore I will wait for him; The Lord is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him."

I love this whole passage, so here it is. Philippians 4:4-9 "Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus. Finally brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable--if anything is excellent or praiseworthy--think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me--put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you."

1 Thessalonians 5:16 "Be joyful always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus."

So... a moment for praise before heading off to bed here....

* I am thankful for our women at church and the ministries that we have going there. It's always so lovely to fellowship with them and to share our hearts as we encourage one another.
* I am thankful for dear boy Colin who played with my kids tonight so I could be in the fellowship meeting. He's a young teenager who loves kids, and it was such a blessing for him to volunteer his time like that for US, me being the one mom who doesn't know what to do with her kids when daddy's not available! It really meant a lot!
* I am thankful for my kids and getting to spend so much time with them. As tiring and frustrating as it can be, I wouldn't want it any other way. I choose to stay home with them, so I need to remember it as a blessing, even on the crummy days.
* I am thankful for my extended family and getting to spend time with them this past weekend. It's been such a long time!
* I am thankful for Kevin's job and all that it provides for our family. This outage is just a part of it. It's all or nothing, so I guess I take this too with thankfulness.
* I am thankful for my new wonderfully-smelling candle from my prayer partner!! I can't wait to burn it tomorrow!
* I am thankful for cozy warm blankets to sleep under at night and space heaters so we don't have to crank up our heat yet.

And with that, it's got me thinking about bed, so I'm signing off now, and hoping to wake up tomorrow with a fresh attitude! Love to you all, my friends!!

Join in and share your thankful heart, and link up with Elyse at Following Him or Lynne at Spiritually Unequal Marriage.


Serendipity said...

Sorry to hear you're having a crummy day. Glad that you have such a thankful heart in spite of it all. May you be filled with God's joy and peace.

krobke said...

Oh Sarah! Brought tears to my eyes this morning! I'm thankful we have a God to loves us sooo much that He provides us peace, comfort and encouragement...JUST when we need it. Gayle's devotion hit home for me too. And I'm thankful for YOU and your family, and that you have chosen to worship with us at ABS. God bless you, and have a WONDERFUL, restful, peaceful weekend.


Julie said...

And I am thankful for you!! You have become a dear friend and I love you...I only wish we had been able to get together this past week. :(

You know that I understand completely and that I am praying for you, always...

Much Love and Many (((HUGS)))


crystal said...

Such a great Thankful post! Thank You for being real...and not trying to hide behind some front. I pray that it gets better for you!


Denise said...

Thank you for sharing your true self, be blessed.

bp said...

Sorry you had such a hard day. Praying for you today.

Thanks for blessing me by sharing the things you are thankful for.

The Fischer Family said...

Oh Sarah! I'm sorry to hear that you're struggling so much right now! Just know that God loves you, and by choosing to stay home you and your children will be so blessed! It is hard (I've had my days too!!!) but today and tomorrow are new days! Praise be! So hang in there and don't forget you are loved!

alisha said...

I'm so sorry that you are having a rough time. I can only imagine how hard it is to be a single mom of two little ones and be pregnant on top of it! You are doing great!

I think you should hire Colin to come over for a few hours one night and play with the kids while you get some work done around the house! OR take a few hours to get out of the house by yourself!

Way to stay positive even when you don't feel like it!!


Amy said...

Ugh. You are so not alone Sarah. I've definitely been feeling the same way, especially today. And I agree, my own attitude disgusts me and I've been trying to focus back to the Lord, it's just hard right now. I'm sure it's just the phase of life we're in with young children, but Oh.My.,some days I feel completely overwhelmed...especially those days when the house gets totally neglected and the kids are demanding, AND there's no husband in site. Ugh. It's so nice to know someone else out there has tough days too. Miss you!

Lynn said...

Oh Girl... You are so right...

I need to refocus back on God and choose thankfulness, choose an "attitude of gratitude".

Amen.. Amen.. Amen.