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Tuesday, December 1, 2009

There isn't anything I'd rather do, sweet child.

Today before nap time I was reading to the kids the book God Gave Us Christmas. I just bought the book this season but have been waiting 'til after Thanksgiving (and coughing) to read it. In the story Mama Bear takes Baby Bear all around showing him the wonders of God and how God gave us Christmas by giving us Jesus. And at the ending of the book, there was this simple conversation that brought tears to my eyes...

"Thanks for showing me God, Mama."
"There isn't anything I'd rather do, sweet child," she said with a kiss.

There isn't anything I'd rather do. Wow. Do I feel like that with my own children? Or do I allow myself to get consumed with to-do's and sibling battles and crying and messes that I forget what my purpose really is??

I admit I have been really struggling lately. I know there's no excuse, God can always provide the strength we need. But this horrible cold I've been battling has left me feeling ultra-frustrated and annoyed at everything the kids do. I'm tired of the constant fighting and the crying. I'm tired of them making messes as I'm trying to clean up. My constant nose blowing has made my ears pop a lot such that their noises are extra-loud. And my lack of full voice makes me feel like they can't hear me well, so I end up yelling even more. I'm tired of disobedience, and I'm tired of anger. I am tired of a messy house. I am just tired. And I've totally allowed myself to get consumed instead of taking joy in the blessing of motherhood. Yeah, the BLESSING OF MOTHERHOOD. It doesn't often feel like that, huh? But that is what it is. Because God has chosen me for this role, and honestly, in the end... there isn't anything I'd rather do.

Dear God, help me to choose joy throughout my days. Help me to not get consumed but to keep focus on the things that really matter. It doesn't really matter when all the puzzles get dumped out at once, but it does matter that I show God to my children with my reaction. So fill me your love and your joy and your peace and your patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, faithfulness, and self-control, that I might glorify you in all of my days. Amen.

3 comments:

Emily of the Clarkson type said...

My dear friend, thanks for your vulnerability. You're an encouragement and blessing, even though we are so far apart. Much love.

Kathy said...

don't be discouraged Sarah! we all have those days! I had one yesterday - just couldn't stand my family for some reason and felt grumpy and frustrated all day. just decide to wake up the next day and start afresh. you are doing a wonderful job with your little ones. =)
kathy

bp said...

I've read several reviews of this book, it sounds like a good one.
Thanks for sharing from your heart. Some days it is just hard. I'm glad you are choosing to give thanks for the blessing it is to be chosen to be a Mom.